The Girl Who Said Yes
I’ve never taken a drug in my life. No sirree. Not for me. I’ve watched in amazement at my friends dancing until dawn, sweating their tits off and gurning like they’d swallowed a lemon rather than an E.
I’m risk averse you see. If I had ever taken anything I would’ve immediately had to taxi myself off to A&E and demand they pump my stomach. No fun for me and rather irritating for the doctors I imagine.
I did try smoking a few times when I was at senior school. But I didn’t inhale. It seems even at the age of 14, I was keenly aware of the risk of lung disease. Plus, what if my little brother saw me (he did once) and told my Mam? There would be repercussions.
Like everyone else, 2020 has given me lots of space to reflect on how I’ve been living my life, and what I’d like to change. I’ve asked myself some pretty harsh, searching questions about whether I’d be happier if I didn’t procrastinate so much. If I didn’t talk myself out of things. If I didn’t have that angel/devil on my shoulder saying “Oooh this is a risky move Sarah.”
It’s why I finally set up this website, something I’ve delayed for years. It’s why I’m 21,000 words into the novel I’ve wanted to write for bloody ages. Because this spring I realised fear alone is not a good enough reason not to take a chance.
With that in mind, I’ve decided that 2021 is going to be the year I say YES. Yes to things that scare me. Yes to things that push me out of my comfort zone. Yes to things I’ve put off for far too long.
Now don’t panic. I’m not saying I’m going to say yes to the drugs. I feel that time has come and gone (although I am planning on a little jaunt to Ibiza for my 40th).
But after a year of missing my mates and being stuck at home; I am going to be the woman who says yes to those spontaneous last-minute nights out. I am going to be the woman who wears the age-inappropriate leather leggings and I am going to be the woman who books the girls weekend away…even though that spa is extortionately out of my price range.
Because you see 2020 has made me realise how quickly that option of spontaneity can be taken away from you. How your freedom can be curtailed out of nowhere. It doesn’t need to be a global pandemic of course. It could be illness, unemployment, caring responsibilities. So whenever I have the chance, 2021 will be the year I grab adventure by the balls.
Get ready world… the answer is YES.